to feel like this
makes me nervous.
i’ve had bad experiences in the past.
i’m not eager to repeat them.

i also don’t want
to get my hopes up
because i feel like every time i do,
i ruin it things.

but on the same note,
i don’t want to be absent of hope.
i just don’t know what is the right amount,
and what is too much.

i am just tired
of having things blow up.
i just want some peace of mind,
and I think you can help provide that.

i close my eyes
and think of you
every time. and i just want you.
your smile, your care, your love.

you don’t judge me.
you don’t expect me
to be something i don’t want to be.
you just accept me.

i secretly hope
that you feel the same way.
and that I cross your mind as much as you cross mine.
but i don’t hope too much…

i hope.

i don’t want to be
the wedge that drives you two apart.
it seems that you
have a good thing going for you.
i don’t want to
ruin that or your happiness.

but i do want you.
and i want to be the one you kiss goodnight.
i just don’t want
to steal you away from what you have.
sometimes it’s tough
to fight the feelings i have and all.

i do not deserve you.
you can tell me otherwise all you want.
but no matter how
amazing you say i am, i know.
i know that you’d
be better off without me.

you are the epitome
of a good thing
something so good
and something with
the best intentions
you are perfectly flawed
yes your scars
make you beautiful to me
it’s nice to see
and be reminded that
even though life can
toss you around a bit
sometimes
it’s possible to be happy
and to love

you make magic that
makes me feel safe and
secure and
like things are
going to work out
after all

infinite things are endless,
as well as unfathomable.
right?
if it is so,
then is beauty endless?
because i truly
cannot fathom,
cannot even begin to wrap my head
around how beautiful you are.
and if that is the case,
then surely,
words are not enough
to describe you. 

love opens up the gates
that were closed before.
love takes you on a journey.
love is priceless. 

you opened a door today
and i walked through.
you said words that meant so much
and made me feel even more
of this feeling.
it’s so great and new.
almost foreign but
welcome.
now, like they’ve always been with you,
the possibilities,
are endless,
and inviting. 

365 days isn’t a lot when you think about it.
52 weeks.
12 months.
one trip around the sun.

many have passed,
many will come.

here’s to 2013. 

a spontaneous drive
took us from point a*
     *my house
to point b, a street above the city*
     *”topish” of haven
and we did something simple there*
     *looked at the lights
they flickered. and I told you why
and we just looked out at the lights
like it was an ocean
or a treasure.
it was cold, so we were close.
it was nice. I don’t know.
something about it was so special.
but then again, so is every moment
i get to spend with you. 

when one line is parallel to another,
they will never meet.

ever.

despite their best efforts.
they need to accept that,
and realize that one day,
a line will come that will be perpendicular.

one day.